Rick W. Perry

If this guy isn’t Bush Part III — holy hell — here’s Rick Perry’s announcement:

Yeah, we totally need another Steve-Austin-squinty-shit-kicking-wingnut-pretend-cowboy. The Republicans will nominate him.

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  • missliberties

    The last squinty eyed Texan won so I wouldn’t be too glib about his chances.

    This is a real fight.

    • holyreality

      Except that the last squinty eyed Texan did not win.

      This is a fight allright, and with milquetoast McFly, versus, Biff on steroids it does not look good.

      Kryptonite to the GOP framing of the wording?

      LIST THE FACTS

      H/T Bartcop.com

  • Robert Scalzi

    YeeHaaaw………. Not.

  • jmby

    Was this a parody? An SNL Bush sketch? How much more “one from column A, one from column B” pandering crap can one jackass throw into a speech? Did he actually practice his Bush imitation in front of his bathroom mirror? Holy shit, Republicans are getting more desperate and delusional by the second. Does the
    GovernmentIsEvilWhiteisRightBushWasAwesomeAndObama IsACommunistSocialistFascistNaziMuslimJustPlainBlackSoWeHateHim- AndPraiseJesus faction of the voting public not hear what most of the country thinks about the Bush “legacy”? Bring this yahoo on. I might enjoy what’s about to happen to him.

  • mattpd

    Did he say “special operators”?

    Did he say that he was thankful they were “sacrificial”?

    They will totally nominate this guy. He’s George W. squinty cowboy with Ronald reagan’s hair.

    • http://twitter.com/bphoon Brian C


      Did he say that he was thankful they were “sacrificial”?

      Yeah, that’s what he said. “…sacrificial men and women.” What a doofus. If I didn’t figure it was either a slip of the tongue or that he’s just too stupid to frame it correctly, I’d say that was a direct insult to our military. Reminds me of a colonel brigade commander I had the intense misfortune of meeting during my flying career who claimed not to have to worry about losing scout pilots: “I got a lot of ‘em. They’re just like frisbees–I just keep throwin’ ‘em out there until one comes back and tells me what’s goin’ on out there.” Real brilliant…

      Another dipshit Texas governor in the White House…yeah, that’s just what we need.

  • muselet

    Rick Perry can read a speech well (he’s a politician, and half the job is being a convincing actor), although his various tics and twitches make me want to have the man tested for a neurological disorder.

    I’m afraid missliberties is right. Substantively, every third word in that speech was a distortion or an outright lie, and if we lived in a rational Universe, he’d have been hooted off the podium by the end of his second sentence; since we don’t—here on Earth Prime, a convincing lie that reinforces a prejudice is more persuasive than truth—Rick Perry is a viable presidential candidate.

    I do have to correct you on one thing, Bob. Rick Perry isn’t just like George W. Bush: unlike GWB, Perry come by that mush-mouth Texas accent honest.

    –alopecia