Karl Rove Loses Shpadoinkle, Challenges Fox News

In case you missed it last night, shortly after Fox News called Ohio and the election for the president, Karl Rove engaged in a math jihad against the network insisting that it called the election too soon.

What ensued was hilarious to watch. Rove frantically attempted to find a path for Romney while Megyn Kelly grabbed a camera crew and marched deep into the Fox News offices, Michael Moore style, to confront the “decision room” over their call.

Rove, with his Crossroads GPS super PAC, spent $300 million in dark money from high-powered contributors to lie about and defeat the president. He failed miserably. So no wonder he deliberately embarrassed his network in service of his real bosses.

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  • bphoon

    Karl: Dude…you need to focus now on how you’re going to explain to your benefactors how and why you wasted so much of their money. Generally speaking, obscenely rich m-fer’ s like them take a pretty dim view of having their bucks flushed down the shitter like that. What I’m sure you called an “investment” returned to them nothing…nothing.

    • atlavely

      How would that “investment” be different from the ones made in bad paper, in sub-prime mortgages? Seems they’re ready to throw it away, based on experience, since they figure to get it all back.

      • Lazarus Durden

        Because they actually did make money in bad paper and sub-primes before the sham was exposed and the economy collapsed. They simply looted the economy and walked away richer.

        In this they got nothing for their money. Nothing. No Senate picks up, no Presidency and in fact the liberal agenda was solidified and advanced last night. They lost big.

  • i_a_c

    And we won Ohio by 100,000 votes. Hahahahahaha.

  • Draxiar

    I love seeing the unthwartable evil genius get his come-uppence.

    Rove is the sort that sees himself as smarter than everyone around him. So when he loses and his evil machinations don’t work he takes it to heart (and grey, wrinkled and dry as his might be) and somehow must prove he’s right. Only this time….MWUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

    • stacib23

      I think that fucker understood Ohio to have been “fixed” and couldn’t understand what in all hell had happened to that fix.

      Okay, here’s my dip into the conspiracy pool:

      The polls for Ohio had been consistently for Obama by 4 – 5 points, sometimes higher, but rarely lower over the past four months. The “fix” was for Romney to win by 1 point, and the fuck up was that they didn’t steal enough votes, and Obama’s win instead of being 4% was instead only 1%.

  • http://twitter.com/SugaRazor Razor

    Anyone who says Fox and MSNBC are the same needs to watch this. Imagine if MSNBC allowed Obama’s chief fundraiser to anchor their election coverage?

  • kushiro -

    “But there are still lots of votes to count in areas that are leaning heavily Democratic. So of course these counties will win it for Romney! DON’T YOU GET IT?!?”

    Then Megyn Kelly says something reasonable.

    FOX people were kookypants last night.

    • bphoon

      Then Megyn Kelly says something reasonable.

      That’s the really big surprise.

  • KABoink_after_wingnut_hacker

    Some very rich folks are going to quote Ricky Ricardo over the next few days.
    Hey Karl; “you got some splainin’ to do”.

  • muselet

    Shorter Karl Rove: Numbers are liberal fascism!

    Don’t you just love the taste of bitter wingnut tears?

    –alopecia

    • Victor_the_Crab

      Rove’s tasting crow today.

  • BuffaloBuckeye

    So, does Sheldon have a contract out on Karl yet?

    • stacib23

      Maybe not, but I hope Rove’s friends have nailed all the windows shut and tossed all razors. LOL

  • Brutlyhonest

    The amount of money spent is a lot to you and me, but it isn’t to them. Yeah, they’re likely very unhappy, but they’ll find a way to make up their losses on the backs of real, working people.

  • chris castle

    After NBC made the call my wife and I, out of sheer morbid curiosity and perhaps a little bloodlust, actually switched over to Fox to see their reaction, and, of course, we witnessed this first hand. Remembering 2000 all to well, we were very concerned [that Rove could be right] and our celebratory mood didn’t completely return until Romney conceded…

    • Zen Diesel

      I did the same thing as well. Darth Rove looked like he had just pooped in his pants.

  • rikyrah

    This video is hilarious.

    Here’s the thing…

    When one is a grifter..

    and one has suckered rich folks out of over 300 million dollars and you don’t have shyt to show for it….

    you’d have a mini-meltdown too.

    remember, the grift can only continue if the marks believe they got something the first time.

  • D_C_Wilson

    The problem with Fox is that you can’t draw a line between the republican operates and the reporters. Everyone there has a vested interest in the outcome of these races.

    I keep saying this, but the biggest problem with the conservative side is that they’ve started to believe their own bullshit. This whole idea that they can create their own reality is now considered an article of faith among them. So, when they crafted this alternate reality where all the polls are “skewed” and the fact checkers are biased, they’re unprepared for when reality comes crashing down on them. They had really convinced themselves that they had this election in the bag. I doubt they had rigged the machines or anything, but they had believed that by throwing enough money at the race, they could win it all.

    Even Karl Rove, their supposed genius strategist, has bought into it. They thought they could bombard the airwaves with attack ads and declare victory. This is why there were so many champagne corks popping in their camp when the Citizens United decision was announced. They thought once the floodgates of cash were opened, they could just fund slick advertisements and herd the sheep to the polls.

    But there was something that went unnoticed during this campaign. In fact, I think of all the pundit class, Rachel Maddow was the only one who made this observation: They had no ground game. The democrats did. They were out there, knocking on doors, registering voters, and getting people to the polls. They organized students and other groups. They were getting the vote out while republicans were sitting in the bubble, denying the existence of reality and math.

    That’s what made a huge difference.

  • Victor_the_Crab

    Betcha Karl wishes he was Ham Rove today.

  • Victor_the_Crab

    Jon Stewart is SOOOOO gonna have fun with this!