We Should All Drink Brawndo Instead of Water

Via LGF, the First Lady has launched a campaign to convince more Americans to drink water since it’s genuinely the healthiest beverage available and, of course, she’s right.

So now Rush Limbaugh is against drinking water and believes there’s a war on soda in America.

We have real trouble, real problems in this country and around the world. What is this push to drink more water? Now, we know that Bloomberg doesn’t want people drink sweetened soft drinks, limiting the size to 16 ounces. I’ll tell you what I think it is. I think there’s an all-out assault on soda pop, soft drinks. That’s why, by the way, if you’ve noticed, all the soft drink companies now have their own version of bottled water. Coca-Cola has their own version of bottled water, and I’m sure Pepsi does.

I don’t know what the brand is, but they’re expanding into bottled water. You know how much bottled water actually comes out of somebody’s tap? You would be amazed. I can’t remember. I had the story not long ago about all of the deception in that industry. You know, I’ve always been amazed. The price of bottled water is far more expensive if you measure it by the gallon. When you go to the store and buy it, it’s far more expensive than a gallon of gasoline.

Water? Like out the toilet?

Also, Charles Johnson called it last week:

This entry was posted in Michelle Obama, Rush Limbaugh and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.
  • Art__VanDalay

    He’s right about one thing; bottled water is a giant scam. But other than that, yeah, still a big fat idiot.

    • Churchlady320

      The vast majority of us have safe, clean water free to anyone out of the tap. Bottled water is ridiculous.

  • Ipecac

    It’s got what plants crave.

  • Draxiar

    Holy Motherfuck. I hope Michelle Obama comes out in favor of air.

  • Nefercat

    I know others have already suggested it, but please, dear FLOTUS, come out in favor of breathing. The likely results will be so much quicker than waiting for stupid stands against healthy eating or drinking habits to take their toll on the vast numbers of betwattled morons populating this country.

  • Lazarus Durden

    Man if the First Lady and the President came out in favor of voting maybe the Conservatives would stay home. *sigh* I wish it worked like that.

  • mrbrink

    Rush is pulling double-duty for stupid, as usual

    The cognitive dissonance is astounding.

    “The deception in that industry” as always amazed Rush Limbaugh, and how dare we protect people from a deceptive industry?!

    Brilliant.

  • The Panic Man

    http://xkcd.com/603/

    Idiocracy is elitist trash.

    • Lady Willpower

      Wait, stick figures don’t like it? I’m convinced.

      • Kitty Smith

        I’m more convinced by the arguments, but then I already knew that Idiocracy was trash,so.

    • D_C_Wilson

      Why? It’s a satirical commentary on the dumbing down of American culture, not a prophecy meant to be taken literally.

      • The Panic Man

        Yeah, and how many people seem to get that? You, me, and Randall Munroe.

    • Schneibster

      Do you know what it means to say someone has an IQ of 100?

  • Robert Scalzi

    ” How long before conservatives start dying of dehydration? ”

    Not Soon Enough

  • Schneibster

    Personally I live near a former military base. It’s pretty polluted groundwater, which should scare the crap out of you: I live fifteen miles from the vegetable basket of America. I use an industrial charcoal filter system that back-flushes itself once a week out a hose into the garden. That’s for the house. Then on my drinking water, I use a reverse osmosis system. My garden hoses are the only unfiltered water on the property. I can taste the difference between garden and house water, and I can taste the difference between house and RO water. And I trust my taster better than any test regimen that costs less than ten thousand bucks.

    Michelle is right, but first we need clean water.

    Rush is a nut. “Dasani” etc. are all only as good as my house water, not nearly as good as my RO water (which is all I drink). If you’re drinking Dasani you might as well drink tap water. And remember that’s the water they use in Pepsi too. So you can’t get out of it by drinking soft drinks either.

    • Churchlady320

      Most of us are far more fortunate than you. I’d personally buy water NOT in bottles but via vending machines that accommodate large gallon jugs – cheaper. But yes, you MUST have your water source cleaned up for those without the filtration resources. We’re working on it with you.

      • Schneibster

        Prolly go faster if not for the sequester.

    • http://www.facebook.com/felonious.grammar Felonious Grammar

      Dry cleaners?

      I and my sidekick get U.V. treated, filtered, and reverse osmosis-ed drinking water in 3 gallon bottles from the grocery store. We’re supposed to have some extra clean tap water in these parts, but it tastes like chlorine. We’ve both found that we can put water in bottles that we can take places with us. Crazy. I know.

      • Schneibster

        I figured I’d amortize the cost.

        I already have and it’s not even three years.

        It’s amazing what you can do with bottles. :D

      • muselet

        Depending on how much chlorine is in the water, a filter pitcher or faucet-end filter (Brita and Pūr are the big brands) might get rid of the taste for a few bucks. You can also boil the water for a minute or two to drive off the chlorine, but that’s a nuisance. (On the other hand, if you have hummingbird feeders, you absolutely should boil tap water or use filtered water because the little pests are sensitive to chlorine.)

        –alopecia

  • Ipecac

    That’s why, by the way, if you’ve noticed, all the soft drink companies now have their own version of bottled water. Coca-Cola has their own version of bottled water, and I’m sure Pepsi does. I don’t know what the brand is, but they’re expanding into bottled water.

    Where the heck does Rush live? They’ve both had their own water products for decades.

  • D_C_Wilson

    Well, Rush did get something right. Most bottled water is just filtered tap water. Aquafina (that’s Pepsi’s brand of bottled water if can you see this, Rush) used to advertise itself as “spring water” until the FDA fined them for false claims. Now it’s just labled as “purified drinking water.” Ironically, I have zero doubt that Rush would have called that “big government intrusion” into the market place.

    But, so what? Michelle Obama suggested people drink more water, not bottled water. Rush seems to think the onlhy alternatives are soda and bottled water.

  • KABoink_after_wingnut_hacker

    Love the video and I swear that I’ve been in meetings exactly like this!
    Arrgh…

    • drspittle

      A Tea Party Caucus meeting without “the smart guy”. Or Meet The Press. That scene nails so much of what is wrong in so many levels.

  • tomshefchik

    Per the pedophile drug addict Limbaugh, “…there’s an all-out assault on soda pop…”

    Wow, I was wondering what all the Shock & Awe was about. Bullets and rockets flying everywhere. No hyperbole needed by some fat ugly ignorant old carnival barker bigot drug addict. No indeedy! Step right up, suckers!

  • Victor_the_Crab

    Rush Limbaugh. The spokescreature for everything that is bad for you.