Rep. Paul Ryan Says The Tea Party Is Indispensable

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Modern Day GOP

 

Having to do damage control over the backdrop of Tea Party cannons, semi-automatic muskets and money bombs being fired into crowds of Republicans,  Rep. Paul Ryan told Fox News Sunday that the right wing terrorists he’s in cahoots with are “valuable”– estimates of at least $1.05– and he’d prefer that the American people never heard a word of this “conversation.” You know? for appearances.

“I  think these groups are valuable. They’re part of our conservative family. I’d prefer to keep these conversations within our family.”

See? Everything’s fine. No worries, America. Nothing to see. Cletus just drank too much jug wine, assaulted every woman in attendance, threatened to set fire to the house, shouted racist obscenities before pissing in the punch bowl and finally passing out to his favorite snuff films, but he’s good people.

Talking about Speaker Boehner’s recent fighting words about being pushed around by the Tea Party, which unleashed hell within the GOP– with For America chairman Brent Bozell calling all this ‘personal’ and a ‘declaration of war’– Paul Ryan attempted to smooth things over:

“John was frustrated because they came out against our agreement before we even reached an agreement. I was frustrated as well. But I see the Tea Party as indispensable.”

Yes, of course. The Tea Party is as indispensable as ever!

Opinions of the Tea Party Movement Since 2010

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  • muselet

    Jug wine? Jug wine? Jumpin’ Jehosaphat, boy, Cletus ain’t never drunk no sissy stuff like wine. ‘Shine, boy, good ol’ Murcan corn liquor, that’s what Cletus drunk. And haven’t you heard? Racism is over, ‘ceptin’ a’course for racism ‘gainst white folk which is the only kind that ever counted anyways. [/cretin]

    It sounds to me like Paul Ryan is pants-wetting terrified of being primaried by the TPers. Couldn’t happen to a more deserving person.

    –alopecia

    • http://drangedinaz.wordpress.com/ IrishGrrrl

      Shorter Ryan, Cletus may be an asshole but he is our asshole

      • muselet

        Alternative shorter Paul Ryan: Put down the gun, Cletus!

        –alopecia

  • KABoink_after_wingnut_hacker

    I like how they continually characterize the Tea Baggers as a separate entity from the republican party.
    It’s nothing more than their lunatic base….always has been and it ain’t nothin’ else.

  • mdblanche

    Are those the Hatfields or the McCoys up there?