Louie Gohmert is Not a Legal Scholar or a Plumber

That goes without saying, but Gohmert has reasserted himself by arguing that federal judges are wrong on same-sex marriage because of physical mechanics.

Gohmert was discussing recent rulings legalizing same-sex marriage when he summed up the decisions of judges as saying, “‘Basically, we haven’t seen any biological evidence to support marriage being between a man and a woman.’”

To that legal explanation, Gohmert said those judges “need some basic plumbing lessons.”

I don’t necessarily want to get into a debate over orifices with Louie Gohmert, so I’ll just assume that Louie is arguing that there is no reason to get married unless you plan to produce biological offspring without the aid of a surrogate or donor. Of course it’s also possible that Gohmert is simply unaware that same-sex partners can reproduce through alternative methods.

In any case, the good news is the ability to reproduce without a third party is not a deciding factor on the minds of federal judges, nor should it be.

In recent weeks judges have ruled, based on precident set by the Supreme Court, that bans on same-sex marriage are unconstitutional because they violate your right to equal treatment under the law.
PegBoard

Marriage, as it is recognized by the state, is a legal term with legal consequences. Judges have seen no evidence that warrants recognizing some marriages but not others. Whether or not the square peg goes inside of the round hole or the star peg goes into the square hole is immaterial.

In so many words, I’m saying Louie Gohmert is a goddamn idiot.

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  • Sabyen91

    We would all be better off if people like Gohmert couldn’t reproduce. It is too bad stupidity doesn’t have a way of shutting that whole thing down.

    • Nefercat

      “We would all be better off if people like Gohmert couldn’t reproduce.”

      We would be even better off if parents of people like Gohmert had been unable to reproduce.

    • Joseph

      There have been suggestions that what became Louie started as an odd growth on a pile of old taco meat in a dive in Pittsburgh TX.

  • GrafZeppelin127
  • Christopher Foxx

    Marriage, as it is recognized by the state, is a legal term with legal consequences.

    Which is why a clear distinction should be made between (for lack of better terminology) marriage and civil unions. That is, between a religious rite (which can have whatever restrictions faith wants to put on it and has no legal standing) and a legal one (which can’t treat any people differently).

  • muselet

    Gohmert … summed up the decisions of judges as saying, “‘Basically, we haven’t seen any biological evidence to support marriage being between a man and a woman.’”

    “Biological evidence”? Oh, Cthulhu below, Louie Gohmert is trying to make a science argument. What a goddamn idiot. *facepalm*

    Righties have no earthly idea what they’re talking about when they talk about John Thomas and Lady Jane, but they have an unhealthy obsession with such things. Basically, they’re all thirteen years old and sex is fascinating and icky in equal measure.

    I do wish these people would grow up.

    –alopecia

  • Kennet

    Everyone knows it’s a star shaped hole, Ashby.

  • notoriousbob

    Gohmert is my favorite idiot right now. He’s just a gift that keeps on giving.