Conspiracy Theory

bcs_alex_jones

According to Alex Jones, an old Pentagon directive that allows the use of military force domestically under “extraordinary emergency circumstances” is proof that President Obama is planning to bomb the Tea Party.

Jones, of course, read this to mean that it is “official and has been confirmed” that the military is “training with tanks, armored vehicles, drones” to “take on the American people, mainly the Tea Party.”

“Well, he’s certainly not thinking that Muslims are a threat,” responded [Larry] Pratt, “so he’s turning to his political opponents, declaring that they’re the enemy and ignoring the fact that Muslims from time to time have a tendency to go ‘boom.’”

Get it? The president isn’t concerned about Muslims because, obviously, he is a Muslim. Amirite?

Stay tuned for our weekly sale on heirloom survival seeds, Iodine, ammunition, gas masks, and bug-out bags.

It’s “official and has been confirmed” that a sucker is born every minute.

This entry was posted in Alex Jones, Conspiracy Theory, Drones, Wingnuts and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink.
  • trgahan

    “….military is “training with tanks, armored vehicles, drones” to “take on the American people, mainly the Tea Party.”

    Considering HOW many American citizens are currently in uniform, their diverse backgrounds, their diverse world views….don’t you think a signficant portion of them would be saying something if their CO’s were having them train to “take on” a gaggle of mouth breathing cos-players with semi-automatic rifles?

    I thought the military was supposed to switch sides the instant “it” happened any way because they supposedly hate taking orders from one of THOSE (or from a non-server like Bill Clinton when all this same shit was happening in the 90′s)? That was why Democrats needed that mysterty UN-Black Panther (totally not a racist among them…) army?

    I know Jones’ world is nicely fact free and it really is all about fleecing resentment filled white guy losers who can’t stand that the world doesn’t need, much less care, about them. But their conspiracies are running all over themselves.

    • eljefejeff

      A few years ago a friend of mine emailed me a youtube video from someone in the military who said she overheard her superiors saying martial law was imminent. That was 3 years ago. Still waiting….

  • vgranucci

    The military has scenarios for everything up to and including space alien invasion and the zombie apocalypse.

  • muselet

    Alex Jones and Larry Pratt. The stupid had to be dangerously close to critical mass when those two were talking.

    –alopecia

  • Ipecac

    Alex Jones is an idiot.

    Why would the military need to train at all? Doesn’t Jones realize that our new “Tri-corner-hat-seeking missiles” would be all Obama needs? Sheesh, why else does he think we would have developed hat-recognition technology?

    • 1933john

      Or, could smell shit for brains,
      if they forgot their hats.

    • D_C_Wilson

      Don’t forget the GPS that’s been installed in every Hoveround sold in America.

  • GrafZeppelin127

    Does anyone else get the idea that they’re making shit up like this so some future Republican administration can get away with actually doing it?