Author Archives: JM Ashby

Ignorance is Bliss

How did outgoing Representative Michele Bachmann defeat the liberals? Bachmann told WorldNutDaily that her secret weapons were “evidence” and “logic.” I took them on with their agenda and I went to the heart of whatever it was they wanted to … Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading

Posted in Super Stupid | Tagged , , | 3 Comments

Number of Uninsured at Lowest Level in 50 Years

From the Council of Economic Advisers: As this week’s data confirm, 2014 has seen dramatic coverage gains, gains matched or exceeded only by those seen in the decade of rapid progress that followed the creation of Medicare and Medicaid. Following … Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading

Posted in Economy, Healthcare | Tagged , | 2 Comments

Obama’s Fault

By all accounts, Sony Pictures operated an unimaginably-vulnerable network where passwords were stored in a plain text file titled “passwords” but, according to Senator John McCain, it’s not Sony’s fault that their system was compromised. It’s Obama’s fault. “By effectively … Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading

Posted in John McCain, North Korea, Security | Tagged , , | 6 Comments

Disorder

Artist – Kevin Siers In other news, President Obama has taken the first steps toward normalizing relations with Cuba. The GOP, as you might expect, is losing their minds. Programming note… I’m still sick and today has been a really … Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading

Posted in Open Thread, Torture | Tagged , , | 5 Comments

Thought Experiment

Artist – Jen Sorensen In other news, soon-to-be Majority Leader Mitch McConnell says his first priority in the next session of Congress will be to approve the Keystone XL pipeline extension. Get the veto pen ready. Meanwhile, Senator Ted Cruz … Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading

Posted in Open Thread, Space, Torture | Tagged , , , , | 2 Comments

Formidable Opponent

Stephen Colbert debates himself on America’s image and torture. The audience was just as amused as I was when Bill O’ said he knows what he’s talking about because he wrote a book once. Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading

Posted in Comedy, Stephen Colbert, Torture | Tagged , | 2 Comments

Browns Player Responds to Noted Asshole Jeffrey Follmer

Cleveland Browns wide receiver Andrew Hawkins has responded to Cleveland Police Patrolman Union chief and noted skinhead Jeffrey Follmer yesterday. This is a long quote but it’s worth reading. “I was taught that justice is a right that every American … Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading

Posted in Justice, Racism | Tagged , , , , , | 10 Comments

Thanks Obama

Last week Kansas Governor Sam Brownback announced that the state would cut spending and transfer money from other areas of the budget to fill a hole generated by Brownback’s signature tax cuts. A significant portion of the funds Brownback intends … Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading

Posted in Economy, Taxes | Tagged , , | 5 Comments

Jeb Bush is Running for President

It looks like we’ll spend a significant portion of the next election talking about shady finance and foreign bank accounts. Again. I am excited to announce I will actively explore the possibility of running for President of the United States: … Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading

Posted in Election 2016, Jeb Bush | 7 Comments

No Hesitation

Artist – John Branch In an interview with the Chicago Sun Times, Attorney General Eric Holder offered praise for professional athletes using their platform to raise awareness. “As my son would point out, everybody copied him. Derrick Rose was the … Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading

Posted in Open Thread | Tagged , , | 2 Comments

Police Unions: Players Should Shut Up and Play Ball

The shirt worn by wide receiver Andrew Hawkins of the Cleveland Browns before yesterday’s game has drawn the ire of the Cleveland Police Patrolman Union which, evidently, has no sense of shame. “It’s pretty pathetic when athletes think they know … Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading

Posted in Justice, Sports | Tagged , , , , , | 4 Comments

Rove: Bush Knew All About Torture

Former President George W. Bush has been thrown under the bus again. Dick Cheney told Fox News last week that Bush knew all about the “techniques” they used at CIA black sites. Former chief of staff Karl Rove was more … Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading

Posted in George W. Bush, Torture | Tagged | 8 Comments

Landslide

Artist – Tim Eagan In other news, Jeb Bush apparently has a financial problem that Bloomberg is referring to as a “Mitt Romney problem.” After reading this, I’d say that’s a perfect description. Documents filed with the U.S. Securities and … Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading

Posted in Elections, Open Thread, Torture | Tagged , | Leave a comment

Pundits Defend America

Stephen Colbert gauges reactions to the torture report beginning with Eric Bolling and “amateur historian and brown-haired guy who’s not Steve Doocy or an historian” Brian Kilmeade. I’m with Wolf Blitzer on this one. As journalists it is our sacred … Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading

Posted in Comedy, Stephen Colbert, Torture | Tagged , , , , | 2 Comments

Cheney: Bush Approved Torture, Knew the “Techniques”

If you believed the meme that George W. Bush was in the dark on torture and knew nothing about it, Darth Cheney himself made it clear during an interview with Fox News that the former president knew all about it. … Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading

Posted in George W. Bush, Torture | Tagged , | 9 Comments

Rick Perry 2016 is a Different Candidate, One Who Doesn’t Even Pretend to Have a High IQ

Rick Perry’s ‘I’m a different candidate’ tour continued during an interview with NBC in which he said running for president has nothing to do with being intelligent. “Running for the presidency’s not an IQ test. It is a test of … Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading

Posted in Election 2016, Rick Perry | Tagged | 11 Comments

German Attorney General: Snowden Document on Merkel’s Bugged Phone is Fake

Germany’s top prosecutor began an investigation after documents released by international man of mystery Edward Snowden showed that Chancellor Angela Merkel’s cellphone was bugged by the NSA. Attorney General Harald Range now says the document released by Snowden isn’t real. … Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading

Posted in NSA, Security | Tagged , , | 13 Comments

Pain and Humiliation

Artist – Joel Pett In other news, the Omnibus spending bill that would prevent a government shutdown might be falling apart due to the fact that it’s terrible. We could see a temporary resolution passed tomorrow that will continue current … Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading

Posted in Government Shutdown, Open Thread, Torture | Tagged , , | 1 Comment

Unhinged History

As we all know, Advanced Placement U.S. History will make you want to join ISIS, so the Koch Brothers have an alternative curriculum that paints a very different picture. Even though our sainted founders owned slaves and included slavery in … Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading

Posted in Education, History, Koch Brothers | Tagged | 10 Comments

Rick Perry 2016 is a Different Candidate, One Who Cares Even Less About the Poor Because Jesus

During an interview with the Washington Post, Rick Perry made the case that he is a different candidate today than the one who failed to name the third government agency he wanted to eliminate. “Oops.” This “substantially different, versed candidate,” … Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading Continue reading

Posted in Election 2016, Rick Perry | Tagged | 16 Comments