Money Votes

MoneyVotes

Artist – Tim Eagan

In other news, a federal judge dismissed two lawsuits against the IRS yesterday because they were based on a thing that doesn’t exist.

The judge also ruled that the IRS had suspended the practice of using watch lists to identify cases requiring extra scrutiny, thus removing one of the grounds for legal action.

Conspiracy theories don’t hold up in court.

Meanwhile, there was another school shooting in America today at Marysville-Pilchuck High School in Washington state. This is the 87th school shooting since the Sandy Hook massacre.

Posted in Open Thread | Tagged , , , | 2 Comments

Outreach: 40 or 50 Percent of Black Voters Are “Clueless”

Fox Business host Stuart “The Goodies” Varney asked former presidential frontrunner Herman Cain if the Democrats playing the “Ferguson card” will drive minority turnout in Georgia.

Hermain Cain insisted that the “Ferguson card” won’t work because 40 to 50 percent of black voters are clueless.

CAIN: A lot of black people are not that stupid or they’re not that that ignorant to respond to something like that.

It’s not 40 or 50 percent of the black population because 40 or 50 percent probably are clueless other than party name or candidate.

No, that’s not contradictory at all.

Asking if Democrats will play the “Ferguson card” is another way of asking if they'll play the “race card” which is another way of asking if Democrats will accurately and honestly discuss racial tension in America.

Posted in Herman Cain, Racism | Tagged , , , | 6 Comments

Left Hand Doesn’t Know What the Right Hand is Doing

JindalStupidParty

Representative Jason Chaffetz (R-UT) wants to know why the White House didn’t ask the non-existent Surgeon General to head up the Ebola response.

On Wednesday, Rep. Jason Chaffetz (R-UT) appeared on Fox News to complain that Klain had not yet agreed to testify before Congress, firing another criticism at the White House. “Why not have the surgeon general head this up?” Chaffetz said, adding, “at least you have someone who has a medical background who has been confirmed by the United States Senate, that’s where we should be actually I think going.”

I understand if the average person is unaware that we do not have a surgeon general because the NRA convinced enough senators to block the nominee, but for a sitting representative to be this clueless is laughable.

A surgeon general has not been “confirmed by the United States Senate” because Chafettz’ Republican colleagues in the Senate unanimously sided against the nominee.

Posted in Congress, Stupid Party, Super Stupid | Tagged , , | 6 Comments

Scott Brown is Not a Scientist and He Has No Need for Scientists

StinkingBadges

While Senator Jeane Shaheen says we should “listen to the experts” on Ebola, her opponent Scott Brown insists that we don’t need no stinkin’ experts.

Brown said part of the problem is that Obama has been providing inconsistent answers on the issue and said a travel ban should be in place to and from West Africa, where Ebola has killed about 4,500 people.

“We don’t need to be experts to deal with this issue,” Brown said. “It’s common sense.”

“She calls it fear mongering. I call it rational fear,” he said.

Shaheen said she would support a travel ban only “if that’s what the experts tell us is needed.”

Duh! Of course the nature of a lethal virus with many variables is common sense. And basing our campaign of fear on completely unfounded horseshit and scary soundbites is totally rational.

Spoiler: the experts say a travel ban would do more harm than good.

That’s why Scott Brown has no need for experts. Experts would only get in the way of his panicmongering.

Ebola is coming to kill us all and it’s probably coming across the border. That’s Brown’s story and he’s sticking to it.

Posted in Epic Fail | Tagged , , , | 6 Comments

Obama’s Fault

When memes become reality.


ThanksObama

Posted in Super Stupid | Tagged , | 2 Comments

George Will Goes Full Legitimate Rape

WillPrivilege

If you’re a victim of rape, is it worth it to come forward and seek treatment?

Conservative columnist George Will was asked that question by a rape victim during his lecture at Miami University on Wednesday night and his response was terrible.

She said the first time she spoke publicly about her sexual assault was during the question and answer portion of the lecture.

She said she asked Will about his comments concerning the cost of treatment for sexual assault victims.

“He replied in a series of non-finished sentences at which point I said, ‘I have specifically received treatment and is it worth it?’ and he said, ‘Yes, it is, but only for real survivors of real rape,’ and it was very diminishing and deterring my ability to talk about it,” she said.

Real Rape™

The ambiguity and vagueness of saying only “real survivors” of “real rape” should come forward puts the onus on victims who may not know exactly what happened to them or may be tempted to blame themselves. It’s a fucking horrible thing to say to the face of a survivor.

Miami University spokeswoman Claire Wagner said the school was not aware of the column George Will wrote in which he said women may falsely claim they were raped because it affords them privilege before the school signed his contract for speaking. Will was paid $48,000 for the lecture.

Do they not even Google the names of their speakers before signing them to contracts?

Posted in Assholery | Tagged , , | 6 Comments

Download This Week’s After Party Podcast! $2 per Download!

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NEW! Download this week’s show via our new Band Camp page. No subscription necessary. Only $2 per download! Major credit and debit cards accepted.

If you’re already a member, go on in.

This Week’s Pulse-Pounding Episode: “The Panthers Organization”: Larry King’s Drunken Exhausted Rave-Out; Larry King’s Crazy Late Night Twitter Rant; Bob Prank Calls Larry King at Duke Ziebert’s; Drinking and Doing Drugs While Exhausted; Our Binge Drinking Tales from Yesteryear; The New Avengers: The Age of Ultron Trailer; Rumor About the First Batman v Superman Trailer; The Foo Fighters and the HBO Sonic Highways Series; and much more.

Posted in After Party | Tagged | Leave a comment

The Bubble Genius Bob & Chez Show 10/23/14

bcs_palins_sunglasses

RELM_buttonI Like Fun: Bob Defeats Sarah Palin; Audio Recording of the Palin Family Brawl; Expensive Fashion Accessories; Charles Bowen’s Fair-Use Guide for Bloggers; The Palins and Their White Trash Stretch Limo; Remembering Ben Bradlee and Real Journalism; The NRA Hipster; Guns are ‘Bits of Plastic and Metal'; and much more. Brought to you by Bubble Genius, the BobCesca.com Amazon Link and The Bowen Law Group.

Bubble Genius

There’s more political banter in the Bob & Chez Show After Party. If you’re not a member, download individual After Party podcasts for $2 each via our Band Camp page.

Listen and subscribe on iTunes (it’s FREE!)
Download the mp3 (55 minutes, 23mb)
RSS Feed
Bob & Chez Show Archive
Listen on your smartphone via Stitcher.com

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Posted in Bob and Chez Show | 2 Comments

The Bubble Genius Bob & Chez Show 10/16/14

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RELM_buttonRobo-Snowden: Shep Smith’s Fantastic Ebola Monologue; News Media Continues its Irresponsible Ebola Hype; Chuck Todd and the Kentucky Senate Race; Rick Scott Freaks Out Over Charlie Crist’s Fan; The New Foo Fighters Documentary; Glenn Greenwald’s Nothing To Hide Challenge; The New Snowden Documentary; Snowden On A Stick; and much more. Brought to you by Bubble Genius, the BobCesca.com Amazon Link and The Bowen Law Group.

Bubble Genius

There’s more political banter in the Bob & Chez Show After Party. If you’re not a member, download individual After Party podcasts for $2 each via our Band Camp page.

Listen and subscribe on iTunes (it’s FREE!)
Download the mp3 (55 minutes, 23mb)
RSS Feed
Bob & Chez Show Archive
Listen on your smartphone via Stitcher.com

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Posted in Bob and Chez Show | 2 Comments

Just Another Day

Common ground

Artist – Adam Zyglis

In other news, Iowa Republican senate candidate Joni Ernst says she’s prepared to use her pistol against the government if it comes to that. Ernst is running for office to become a member of the government.

Meanwhile, South Carolina congressional nominee Anthony Culler (R) is prepared to use his finger pistol against gay gremlins. Or something.

America runs on Dunkin Donuts guns.

Programming note… cutting things off early today because of early dinner plans.

Tagged , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Worst Person in the World

OldManCloud

Representative Don Young (R-AK) is a horrible person.

Young offended a lot of people on Tuesday of this week when he told a crowd of high school students that suicide can be blamed on a lack of support from friends and family.

Young compounded his awfulness yesterday by saying that suicide can be blamed on big government; because the people of Alaska have become entitled free-loaders.

Asked about the “lack of support” comment, Young expanded on it and added that suicide in Alaska didn’t exist before “government largesse” gave residents an entitlement mentality, according to an audio recording of his senior center appearance. [...]

“When people had to work and had to provide and had to keep warm by putting participation in cutting wood and catching the fish and killing the animals, we didn’t have the suicide problem,” he says on the recording.

Suicide comes from federal government largesse “saying you are not worth anything but you are going to get something for nothing,” he says.

If only we could all go back to being hunter-gatherers, we could end this suicide business.

This began when Young accused high school administrators of “coddling” their students after the suicide of a fellow classmate and it somehow transformed into Young yelling at the clouds about entitlement.

Don Young is man who should have rode off into the sunset about a decade (or three) ago.

Posted in Worst Persons | Tagged , , | 7 Comments

Scott Brown Forgets He’s Not a State Senator From MA

Former Senator Scott Brown recently donated to his own campaign and the state of Massachusetts was listed as his employer.

via Local ABC Affiliate WMUR

[In] Brown’s latest campaign finance report, Brown is listed as donating $244 to his campaign on Sept. 9, the day of the Republican primary. His employer is listed as “Commonwealth of MA” and is occupation as “state senator.”

The report was filed with the Senate last week, as required, but the Federal Election Commission has not put it online yet.

Brown is now a resident of New Hampshire. Allegedly.

Posted in Epic Fail | Tagged , | 1 Comment

Gohmert Shares His Deepest Fantasies About Gays in the Military

The problem with gays in the military, Representative Louie Gohmert (R-TX) tells us, is that they won’t be prepared to fight because they’ve been giving and receiving hand jobs all day.

GOHMERT: “I’ve had people say, ‘Hey, you know, there’s nothing wrong with gays in the military. Look at the Greeks. Well, you know, they did have people come along who they loved that was the same sex and would give them massages before they went into battle. But you know what, it’s a different kind of fighting, it’s a different kind of war and if you’re sitting around getting massages all day ready to go into a big, planned battle, then you’re not going to last very long. It’s guerrilla fighting. You are going to be ultimately vulnerable to terrorism and if that’s what you start doing in the military like the Greeks did … as people have said, ‘Louie, you have got to understand, you don’t even know your history.’ Oh yes I do. I know exactly. It’s not a good idea”

I’m a little confused.

Gohmert appears to be saying gay Greeks were effective because they fought on open battlefields, but gay men and women serving today will be unprepared because they could be attacked at any moment and they might be caught with their pants down. Literally.

He doesn’t have a lot of confidence in the professional discipline of the US military, does he?

Gohmert believes Don’t Ask Don’t Tell should not have been repealed because, clearly, our servicemen and women will be more prepared for what lies ahead if they live in shame and give each other “massages” in secret rather than openly.

Posted in LGBT, WTF | Tagged , , , | 13 Comments

Justification

Justification

Artist – Nick Anderson

In other news, the economic situation in Kansas, which has been referred to as a “disaster” and “catastrophe” by local press, became worse today as the state once again missed revenue targets by 10 percent.

It’s almost as if cutting taxes does not increase revenue. Nobody could have predicted.

For his part, Governor Brownback would like to assure everyone that tax cut magic will kick in any time now. Just wait for it.

Posted in Open Thread | Tagged , , , | 3 Comments

Scott Brown: I Didn’t Say That Thing I Said Several Times

Former Senator Scott Brown insists that he did not say ISIS is poised to cross the southern border even though he’s been saying that for weeks.

“With respect, I did not say that — what I have said is ISIS is real,” Brown responded.

“Is there a possibility?” Brown continued. “It’s been raised that there are opportunities for people to come through that border. What are their intentions, I’m not sure, but they have made it very clear that they want to plant a flag in the White House.”

Last month Scott Brown produced this ad in which he said President Obama and his opponent Jeanne Shaheen made a mistake by targeting ISIS in Iraq rather than Mexico.

Radical Islamic terrorists are threatening to cause the collapse of our country. President Obama and Senator Shaheen seem confused about the nature of the threat.

Not me. I want to secure the border, keep out the people who would do us harm, and restore America’s leadership in the world.

You can also take Scott Brown’s word for it on his own website.

“Never mind that these ISIS thugs have been saying for months that they’re going to send people here to kill Americans on as big a scale as they can. And never mind that a porous border is the most obvious pathway for terrorists to enter our country.”

Brown also recently said that it would be “naive” to think terrorists won’t waltz across the allegedly-porous border.

“I think it’s naive to think that people aren’t going to be walking through here who have those types of diseases and/or other types of intent, criminal or terrorist. And yet we do nothing to secure our border. It’s dangerous. And that’s the difference. I voted to secure it. Senator Shaheen has not.”

And Brown also told Fox News that ISIS may already be here.

“As you know, what happened recently with the beheading of one of our own, there’s deep concerns that there are members of ISIS actually coming through the border right now,” Brown said on Fox News.

This is without mentioning several instances in which Brown has claimed that Ebola will be brought across the border.

Scott Brown is a bad person and an even worse candidate.

Posted in Terrorism | Tagged , , | 7 Comments

Jody Hice’s Theory of Everything: Public School Leads to Environmentalism, Homosexuality, Abortion, Cultural Tolerance

JodyHice

Jody Hice will probably be a member of Congress come January.

Jody Hice says public schools are just like Nazi Germany.

HICE: Obviously, if we have government — which is what the public school is — if we have government indoctrinating what students are learning, then we have a problem. This took place in Germany, friends. I’m not trying to say we are necessarily headed in that direction, but it is undeniable that one of the first things Hitler did was to grab, so to speak, the minds of the youth. And once he was able to instill in those young minds his own ideals and his own philosophy and that of the Nazi Party, then the rest of it was pretty much a piece of cake. It was a cakewalk to go through once you had the minds of the schoolchildren at every age level.

He’s not saying, he’s just sayin’.

Let’s assume for a moment that public education is a nefarious Nazi plot. If that’s the case, why hasn’t the secret society of indoctrinated brownshirts emerged yet? Public school as we know it today has been around since before World War II. What are we waiting for? Because if public education is an indoctrination mill, everyone reading this could be a sleeper agent.

After comparing public education in America to Nazi indoctrination, Hice went on to say that schools are teaching children to hate American and defend homosexuals. He also says public schools are teaching kids to respect other cultures which, I guess, is an unspeakable heresy. And he says public schools are teaching children to be pro-abortion environmentalists who freely explore their sexuality.

via RightWingWatch

He warned that schools are engaging in “the intentional training of students to dislike, to actually disdain America” and “encouraging students to freely experiment with all forms of sexuality, forcefully defend issues like abortion and homosexuality and also just encouraging students to become cultural advocates for political correctness, and there’s no tolerance for political incorrectness.

There’s the push for relativism, for globalization, for environmental agendas, the green agendas and tolerance for everybody,” he continued. “All of this stuff is now being pushed upon children in the public school system.”

The hell you say? They’re teaching “tolerance for everybody?” Burn the witch!

If even half of what he says is true, I’d say our public schools are in better shape than I thought.

Posted in Education, Wingnuts | Tagged , , | 4 Comments

Governor Rick Scott Doesn’t Know How Minimum Wage Works or Doesn’t Care, or Both

Does Florida Governor Rick Scott support having a minimum wage?

“Sure” he says, but he has on idea how it does or should work.

In a gubernatorial debate Tuesday night, Florida Gov. Rick Scott (R) was asked whether he supports the concept of a minimum wage.

“Sure,” he replied. But when asked what it should be, he responded, “How would I know — I mean, the private sector decides wages.”

PicardWTF

Yeah, how would the fucking governor know what the minimum wage should be?

Holy Jesus.

When he was asked again whether he supports the government setting the minimum wage, he said, “Just because they set a minimum wage doesn’t mean you get a job.

Who? What? Huh? Rick Scott speaks in tongues. Parseltongue, to be more specific.

Posted in Epic Fail, Rick Scott, Super Stupid | Tagged , , , | 4 Comments

Here’s a Brilliant Idea

Cheney/Giuliani 2016!


I’m not sure if you could come up with a more disgusting combination. Let me know if you can.

Posted in Election 2016, Rudy Giuliani | Tagged , , | 21 Comments

One Stop Shop

Doomsday

The firearms industry and the doomsday survival industry market themselves to the same audience so it’s only logical that the two would begin to merge.

The Iowa-based Brownells firearms company is now selling survival kits for the global pandemic.

The company has unveiled pandemic kits, which contain filter masks, black nitrile gloves, first-aid supplies, camp stoves and other equipment to boil and sterilize items. The kits range in price from $55 to $120. [...]

“Ebola has increased the worry that you’ll be touching things you shouldn’t be touching,” said Larry Weeks, a company spokesman.

Weeks said Brownells launched the line of Emergency & Survival Gear kits in the last year. The “bug-out bags,” trauma packs and other kits are designed to help you survive civil unrest, power blackouts, car accidents, hurricanes, wildfires, or whatever else an unruly world throws at you. The line includes a $469 “Get-Home-Bag” with sleeping bag, hatchet, knives, paracord, zip ties and other supplies, “perfectly suited to keep on hand in your office, dorm room or the trunk of your car.”

There’s nothing wrong with being prepared for a natural disaster, in fact the U.S. government and other organizations offer advice on items you should have for emergency preparedness, but let’s not beat around the bush.

“Pandemic kits” and other survival gear that will help you survive “civil unrest” are items marketed to conspiracy theorists, end-timers, doomsday-preppers and other anti-government types. The type who open fire on unsuspecting state police officers and then lead authorities on a wild goose chase into the forest.

Chances are the items contained in these kits will expire or decay before they’re ever used; before the UN troops arrive or the president usurps all power with the help of his immigrant vanguard.

Suckers.

Posted in Gun Fetishists, Guns | Tagged , , | 5 Comments

We’re All Going to Die After These Messages

TheseMessages

Artist – Chan Lowe

To answer my own question which I posted last week — peak fearmonger clearly is a myth because this just keeps getting more ridiculous.

Writing for the Washington Post, Marc Thiessen shares a hypothetical bio-terrorism snuff film that takes place in his head each night.

Terrorists could collect samples of infected body fluids, and then place them on doorknobs, handrails or airplane tray tables, allowing Ebola to spread quietly before officials even realize that a biological attack has taken place.

Think it can’t happen? If an Ebola-infected Liberian, Thomas Eric Duncan, was able to fly to Dallas, what is to stop an Ebola-infected terrorist from doing the same? And if our health-care system was unable to handle a single Ebola patient, imagine what would happen if 50, 100 or more Ebola patients started showing up at U.S. hospitals.

The only people infected by Thomas Eric Duncan were the nurses who directly cared for him without protective gear. Duncan traveled here and had close contact with family without infecting anyone else.

Our healthcare system is handling other Ebola patients just fine. Thomas Eric Duncan was handled poorly by for-profit hospital administrators who first sent him home from the ER and did not prepare their staff for what they faced next. You could make the case that the only reason he died is because he was sent home after his first visit to the hospital.

What’s to stop terrorists from smearing Ebola on your doorknobs? I don’t know, what’s to stop monkeys from flying out of Thiessen’s ass?

Posted in Open Thread, Terrorism | Tagged , , | 2 Comments