Scandal Probe

ScandalProbe

Artist – Pat Bagley

In other news, Chris McDaniel announced today that he is suing the Rankin County Circuit Clerk to gain access to poll books. The law states that personal information must be redacted before the books are handed over, however, meaning the McDaniel campaign isn’t going to find what they’re looking for.

McDaniel isn’t giving up his quest to find black voters who (he says) don’t belong.

Meanwhile, Todd “Legitimate Rape” Akin is continuing his comeback tour. He now claims GOP leadership torpedoed his campaign because they’re ‘anti-American.’

Keep talking, please.

Posted in Open Thread | Tagged , , , | 1 Comment

Thank You, Racism

ColbertRacism

Colbert is back from vacation and he’s talking about the Republican lawsuit against President Obama no his “long, award-losing segment: Thank You, Racism.”

If there’s one thing I’ve always said about our President Barack Obama is that he’s an ineffectual weakling in mom-jeans, but if there’s a second thing I’ve said it’s that he’s an imperial tyrant with an iron fist in mom-jeans. And facing the last two years of his life-long rule, Obama has sworn to use executive orders to ram his nefarious agenda down America’s gullet. [...]

I see only now that executive orders have always been wrong, but without my apparent distrust of black people I wouldn’t have had the courage to suddenly be moved to protect the constitution from the overreach I didn’t care about before. Now I am standing up for America or against Obama. Whatever. Same diff.

I know I’ve said some terrible things about racism in the past, folks, but I guess I pre-judged racism without really knowing it.

Nailed it.

Posted in Comedy, President Obama, Racism, Stephen Colbert | Tagged , , , | 3 Comments

GOP Rep: Undocumented Children Might Have Ebola

Representative Phil Gingrey (R-GA) has cooked up another reason why you should be very afraid of undocumented children — they may carry Ebola.

Last week, Rep. Phil Gingrey (R-Ga.) wrote a letter to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention with a dire warning: Some of the child refugees streaming across the southern border into the United States might carry deadly diseases. “Reports of illegal immigrants carrying deadly diseases such as swine flu, dengue fever, Ebola virus and tuberculosis are particularly concerning,” Gingrey wrote. “Many of the children who are coming across the border also lack basic vaccinations such as those to prevent chicken pox or measles.”

As Mother Jones points out, Gingrey’s concern about undocumented children who haven’t been vaccinated comes off as little more than concern trolling given that Gingrey himself opposes mandatory vaccinations.

Gingrey is a surrogate for the anti-vaccine Association of American Physicians and Surgeons and in 2007 he sponsored an amendment to allow parents to block HPV vaccinations.

Furthermore, the sad truth is the children migrating from Central America are actually more likely to be vaccinated than American children according to a report from the Texas Observer.

According to the United Nations Children’s Fund (UNICEF), Guatemalan kids are more likely than Texans to be immunized for most infectious diseases. Guatemala has universal health care. Vaccines are 100 percent funded by the government.

By comparison, one in six kids in Texas is uninsured, and even insured families often must pay for vaccination. [...]

UNICEF reports that 93 percent of kids in Guatemala, Honduras and El Salvador are vaccinated against measles. That’s better than American kids (92 percent).

Republican leadership in Texas has refused to expand Medicaid under Obamacare, denying healthcare to at least 1.5 million people.

USA! USA!

Posted in Immigration | Tagged , , | 11 Comments

Gun Nuts March to Take Their Country Back From Brown Children

Over 50 open carry activists and other assorted wingnuts marched through Vassar, Michigan to protest the possibility that undocumented children may be housed at a nearby human services facility reports Michigan Live.

That’s right. No children have actually arrived there yet but it’s possible and we must put a stop to it immediately.

The group, led by Michiganders for Immigration Control and Enforcement organizer Tamyra Murray, marched a little more than a mile, from Vassar City Hall to Wolverine Human Services’ Pioneer Work and Learn Center.

Some carried AR-15 rifles and handguns, while others carried Gadsden “Don’t Tread on Me” flags, American flags and Rochester resident Jeff McQueen’s “second American revolution” flags, designed from Betsy Ross’ flag with a Roman Numeral II in the middle.

The leader, Tamyra Murray, reportedly said they’re “not against kids” but they’re marching through the street with AR15s and Gadsden flags to protest the possible arrival of kids. Or something.

Murray said some of the children “belong to gangs and act as drug runners for cartels, and others coming across the border are coughing blood and have suspected tuberculosis.”

It gets better worse.

Murray said she has connections and friends along the Mexican border who are providing her with information on the situation.

Representative Steve King (R-IA) has apparently inspired a whole new movement of secret border control agents who’ve been given access to inside information from their imaginary friends.

NoIllegalsMI

(photo: Coty Giannelli/Mlive)

Posted in Immigration | Tagged , | 7 Comments

Swing and a Miss

Just one photograph can tell you a lot about the people who are taking time out of their lives to protest children.

IlleaglesDerp

“No Illeagles”

If you’re going to spray paint something that is clearly intended for the world to see, you should probably make sure you spell it right.

The building with the misspelled graffiti is a federal facility that may be used as a shelter for undocumented children that are being dispersed throughout the country. The children will remain in the custody and care of the Department of Health and Human Services, but apparently some local residents in Westminster, Maryland think brown children do not belong in their town even if they’re confined to a federal facility.

(photo: Jenna Johnson/The Washington Post)

Posted in Immigration, Super Stupid | Tagged , | 6 Comments

Outreach

Representative Renee Ellmers (R-NC) has pinpointed the reason Republicans have trouble reaching out to women — they use big words.

ELLMERS: “Men do tend to talk about things on a much higher level. Many of my male colleagues, when they go to the House floor, you know, they’ve got some pie chart or graph behind them and they’re talking about trillions of dollars and how, you know, the debt is awful and, you know, we all agree with that … we need our male colleagues to understand that if you can bring it down to a woman’s level and what everything that she is balancing in her life — that’s the way to go.”

On second thought, maybe taking outreach advice from Ellmers isn’t such a great idea.

As you may recall, Ellmers made headlines during the GOP Government Shutdown of 2013 when she said “I need my paycheck” unlike the furloughed federal employees who apparently didn’t need their paychecks as much as she did.

DoingGreat

Posted in Quote | Tagged , | 4 Comments

The Real Enemies Aren’t Undocumented Immigrants, It’s Rick Perry and Sean Hannity

For the last several days, the above photo of Gov. Rick Perry (R-TX) and Sean Hannity has haunted me. During the current unhinged freakout surrounding immigration reform and, specifically, the Central American teens and children being held by the U.S. after having entered the country via the Mexican border, I can't help but to the think that the true threats to the U.S. aren't undocumented immigrants, be they adults or children, but rather these dinguses: When I see this photo, taken at the Texas/Mexico border late last week and tweeted out by Hannity, I see more than just a pair of brainless conservative poseurs whom William F. Buckley would've laughed out of his movement 40 years ago, yet who are now two of the standard-bearers of what's left of that movement. When I see this photo, I see more than a slack-jawed Southern governor and a paint-by-numbers Fox News polemicist. I see two men who are illustrative of everything that is, in Jon Stewart's words, "hurting America." Just look at the photo again. Beginning with the obvious, they're white middle-aged men. That right there is enough to raise eyebrows. As a middle-aged white guy myself, I don't mind indicting my own: yes, middle-aged white men are trouble. The reasons are self-evident. Toss into the mix the availability of a growing variety of pharmaceuticals and Cromagnon tire-flipping workouts designed to amplify the pseudo-dementia that accompanies being a white male in the throes of mid-life, and the trouble [cough] grows. But, really, are middle-aged white men annoying and obnoxious? Oh, yes. Are they dangerous on a macro societal level? Not quite, no, at least no more so than white men in general. But stay with me, there's much more to this puzzle. Hannity and Perry are men of significant means: wealthy and privileged. This gives them fuck-you power. So, now, we see middle-aged white men with fuck-you power. The danger begins to gurgle to the surface. Peel the onion a little further, and... CONTINUE READING
Posted in Immigration, The Daily Banter | 1 Comment

Morning Awesome

ELO – “Poker” Live

Posted in Morning Awesome, Music | Tagged | 1 Comment

Executive Leadership

ExecutiveLeadership

Artist – Rob Rogers

In other news, another Republican is demanding that Obama administration ignore the law to please him. Nebraska Gov. Dave Heineman (R) wants the names of all undocumented children being housed at federal facilities in his state even though current law prohibits the federal government from releasing their names.

Why does he want their names? It’s not entirely clear but apparently he’s very concerned that the children will escape and do… something.

Meanwhile, Citigroup will pay $7 billion, including a record $4 billion civil penalty, to settle a Justice Department investigation into the subprime mortgage market that crashed the economy in 2008.

Posted in Open Thread | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment

Domestic Terrorist Planning to Kill Police Wanted an Uprising

Another domestic terrorist planning to kill police officers and destroy infrastructure was arrested in Utah on Friday night before he could carry out his plans.

Reuters

The Tremonton Police Department was tipped off to the plot in February and launched an investigation with the FBI, prosecutors said. The probe found that Huggins planned to bomb the station and kill two officers, they said.

Huggins also planned to blow up bridges and other infrastructure to slow the emergency response, court documents show.

“Huggins stated that he thought that this action would cause the community to rise up against the government,” according to an affidavit filed in court.

It’s not clear to me what part of bombing a city police station is supposed to incite the community to rise up against “the government.”

America is apparently home to a special breed of domestic terrorists who haven’t quite thought out their righteous plans because conservative Hate Radio did most of their thinking for them.

Those who incite violence in America paint “the government” with a very wide brush, but while the intended target of their anger is the federal government, more often than not it’s local city or state authorities who have little to no association with the federal government who wind up as the targets or victims of domestic terrorism.

Maybe we shouldn’t have high expectations for terrorists in America. Terrorists in other nations are often indiscriminate.

Inciting Americans to rise up against the government may be difficult while there are no legitimate reasons for doing so. Your neighbors getting gay-married or the EPA ensuring that your water is clean aren’t legitimate reasons.

If you take the way-back machine a few years, you’d find Republicans losing their collective shit over a Department of Homeland Security memo warning about the dangers of right wing domestic terrorism.

Posted in Wingnuts | Tagged | 3 Comments

Idiot Congressman Sponsors Amendment That Does Nothing

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House Republicans apparently passed an amendment to an appropriations bill last week which would prohibit the Department of Energy from doing something they have no control over.

They voted overwhelmingly Thursday to bar the Energy Department from blocking approval of offshore-drilling permits. But there’s just one thing: The Energy Department doesn’t regulate drilling. The Interior Department does.

The prohibition on the Energy Department regulating something that it doesn’t regulate came via Republican Rep. Steve Stockman’s amendment to a wider department spending bill, which also passed Thursday.

No word on whether Steve “If Babies Had Guns” Stockman’s amendment came from one of those chain emails he’s been spamming his colleagues with.

Conservatism is a mental illness.

Posted in Congress, Environment, Epic Fail, Steve Stockman | Tagged , , | 6 Comments

Todd Akin is Talking About Rape Again

Disgraced former congressman Todd “Legitimate Rape” Akin is certain that Bill Clinton is a rapist and he’s upset because Politico wouldn’t publish his accusation that Clinton is a “credibly accused rapist.”

via TPM

In one paragraph of its story, Politico described how Akin says he wishes Republican presidential nominee Mitt Romney had addressed the controversy surrounding Akin’s “legitimate rape” comments at the 2012 GOP convention. It reads in the Politico piece: “[Bill Clinton] is giving the keynote speech at the Democratic convention in two weeks, and you want me to denounce a decent, God-fearing man for his inelegant comments about rape? No, not happening, and if the truth hurts, put some ice on it.”

Those brackets apparently eliminated Akin’s description of Clinton as “a credibly accused rapist,” according to his WND op-ed. Akin went on to recount previously reported sexual assault allegations against the former president.

“As I explain in the book, rape is a horrible crime,” he wrote. “I have zero sympathy for those who commit it. For this reason, had I been in Congress in 1998, I would have voted with my colleagues to impeach President Bill Clinton.”

From this we can infer that the supposed victims of Bill Clinton were legitimately raped, right?

I’ll show myself out.

Posted in Epic Fail | Tagged , , | 3 Comments

Conspiracy Theorists Ask the Tyrant President to Ignore the Law

tinfoilHats

We have enough Obama/Immigration conspiracy theories to curate a wikipedia page at this point, but when infamous insane person Tom Tancredo spelled out his conspiracy theory he also said something else that is far more interesting and seemingly contradictory.

via RightWingWatch

Former Colorado Republican Rep. Tom Tancredo, said Wednesday that the crisis of Central American refugees at the southern border is “all part of a plan” by President Obama to “fundamentally transform America.”

Speaking with Newsmax host Steve Malzberg, Tancredo said that the president should simply ignore the Bush-era child-trafficking law that is complicating attempts to deal with child refugees.

If you’re the president you have to be confused because you stand accused of being an all-scheming deceiver who flouts the law, but at the same time people are demanding that you ignore the law.

The anti-human trafficking law Tancredo is demanding the president ignore is the William Wilberforce Trafficking Victims Protection Reauthorization Act of 2008 which was signed by former President Bush.

The law requires that children who enter the country unaccompanied be granted a hearing before their deportation and that the children remain in the care of the Department of Health and Human Services. The law was passed in the interests of ensuring that we don’t immediately deport victims of human trafficking or abuse.

In this instance the president is absolutely following the law, but he’s facing demands to ignore the law because we have to get the brown kids out of the country as soon as possible regardless of why they’re here.

As for the conspiracy theory, this is what Tancredo had to say:

“And you know how this sounds, I know how people immediately go, ‘Oh, there’s a conspiracy theorist out there.’ Now, look. It’s not a conspiracy if he tells the world what he wants. If Obama says on numerous occasions, ‘I intend to fundamentally transform’ and then he begins doing it, it’s not a conspiracy. This is absolutely part of that.”

Duh. The president said he was going to transform the nation by fostering violence in other nations which would inevitably lead to the increased migration of children who would then be placed in federal processing facilities while they await deportation.

Boom. Transformed.

Tancredo is not the first person to demand that the president ignore the law, but he may be the first to call for ignoring the law while simultaneously accusing the president of creating the problem as part of some nefarious “plan.”

Posted in Conspiracy Theory, Immigration, Wingnuts | Tagged , | 5 Comments

GOP Rep. Spots Threatening Undocumented Teenagers at a Glance

House Homeland Security Committee Chairman Michael McCaul (R-TX) says the situation on the border is “heart-wrenching,” but he has also seen some very scary kids and he thinks the deportation of “heart-wrenching” babies should be expedited.

There’s always a “but.”

“It’s very heart-wrenching as a father to see that — mothers with their babies,” McCaul said on “Fox News Sunday.” “I also saw some 17-year-olds that I thought looked more like a threat to coming into the United States.” [...]

While he said that some may qualify to stay in the U.S., that most needed to be sent away as a “message of deterrence.”

He called for immigration policy changes, including tweaking the 2008 anti-trafficking law to make it easier to quickly deport immigrant children from Central America.

It’s not clear what features of an undocumented teenager make them look like a threat to national security any more than an average (read: white) teenager.

Is Representative McCaul a trained criminal profiler who can spot teenagers that pose a threat to the nation just by glancing at them?

The GOP has no one to blame but themselves if no one takes them seriously when they feign concern about the well-being and welfare of undocumented children.

If they actually cared, would they outright refuse to pass the president’s funding proposal which would improve living conditions for the children while they wait to be deported?

“It’s very heart-wrenching as a father to see that — mothers with their babies — because Family Values, but I won’t lift a finger to help them.”

The great irony is that Republicans have had more than plenty of time to participate in the process and pass comprehensive immigration reform, but they’ve chosen to sit on their hands instead.

One could argue that the comprehensive immigration reform bill passed by the democratically-controlled Senate was very generous toward conservative causes, such as increased border security, but it was declared dead-on-arrival by the Party of Steve King because it included a path to citizenship.

Posted in Congress, Immigration | Tagged , , | 2 Comments

Bill Kristol Is Finally Right About Sarah Palin: Impeaching Obama is ‘Irresponsible’

It was brief, but it really happened. Fox News, and now ABC News contributor, Bill Kristol was actually right about something. As we’ve observed over the years, whatever Kristol says, the opposite must be true. Some of his greatest hits include:

–”Barack Obama is not going to beat Hillary Clinton in a single Democratic primary. I’ll predict that right now.”

–1993 was the “high water mark” of the LGBT rights movement.

–After encouraging Sen. John McCain (R-AZ) to invoke Bill Ayers in his campaign for president, Kristol chastised the campaign for doing exactly that, calling it “stupid” politics.

–”[The Iraq War] will clarify who was right and who was wrong about weapons of mass destruction. [...] It will reveal the aspirations of the people of Iraq, and expose the truth about Saddam’s regime.”

Kristol is also one of two or three conservative operatives who scouted and pitched Sarah Palin as a rising star in the GOP, urging McCain to select her as his running-mate in 2008.

Galactically wrong.

However, on Sunday’s This Week with George Stephanopoulos, following a video clip of Palin in which she hamfistedly demanded Obama’s impeachment, Kristol observed that no “responsible” elected official has called for the impeachment of President Obama.

No responsible elected official has called for impeachment. And the one problem with it of course is get Joe Biden as president.

Given the stopped-watch phenomenon, Kristol was destined to trip and fall onto a correct statement at some point. Yet the fact that his hand-picked candidate is one of the primary screechers calling for impeachment underscores how wrong he was about Palin. He was so wrong about her that — sorry, Bill — it cancels out his rightness on the irresponsibility of Republicans who are leaning on the jolly, candy-like impeachment button. Sure, Palin isn’t currently an office-holder, but the fact that her views are perfectly in line with elected officials who are, indeed, irresponsible speaks volumes about her, not to mention one of her earliest benefactors: Bill Kristol.

Yes, Kristol was one of the architects of Palin’s emergence in 2008, and now he considers her to be aligned with an irresponsible impeachment effort… CONTINUE READING

Posted in Sarah Palin, The Daily Banter | Tagged | Leave a comment

Morning Awesome

Rush – “Middletown Dreams” Live

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The Bubble Genius Bob & Chez Show 7/10/14

bcs_greenwald_fireworks

Spectacular Multicolored Hues: Glenn Greenwald’s NSA Grand Finale; Maybe; Good Journalism versus Bad Journalism; Godwin’s Law; Outrage is in The Gaps; The Alex Jones-ification of News; Trolls and Colon Cancer; Alex Jones’ New Conspiracy Theory About Michelle Obama; Dan Bidondi’s Campaign Website; Bidondi’s Insane Job Qualifications; and much more. Brought to you by Bubble Genius, the BobCesca.com Amazon Link and the Bowen Law Group.

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Bubble Genius

Posted in Bob and Chez Show | 14 Comments

Serious Business

SeriousBusiness

Artist – John Cole

In other news, the Treasury Department recorded a budget surplus of $71 billion for the month of June.

Meanwhile, Senator Marco Rubio is back to supporting his own immigration bill again. Maybe. Let’s see if this holds up through Monday or if there’s a “clarification” over the weekend.

Posted in Open Thread | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

Rep. Gohmert Wants to Raise Taxes to Pay for a Military Campaign Against Children

bcs_gohmert_wall

Representative Louie Gohmert isn’t interested in approving President Obama’s spending request of $3.7 billion which would fund additional processing centers, judges, lawyers, and border control agents, but he is interested in seeing his home state of Texas raise taxes to fund a hot war against children.

GOHMERT: “I’m hoping that my governor will utilize Article 1, Section 10, that allows a state that is being invadedin our case more than twice as many just in recent months, more than twice as many than invaded France on D-Day with a doubling of that coming en route, on their way here now under Article 1, Section 10, the state of Texas would appear to have the right, not only to use whatever means, whether it’s troops, even using ships of war, even exacting a tax on interstate commerce that wouldn’t normally be allowed to have or utilize, they’d be entitled in order to pay to stop the invasion.

The idea that small, unaccompanied, malnourished children coming across the border are comparable to an invading army is absolutely ludicrous and unhinged. Furthermore, over 150,000 men invaded France on D-Day, but our best estimates say that approximately 50,000 undocumented children have entered the United States. So his numbers are a bit off in addition to being a fucking ridiculous comparison.

I’m clearly going to need a refresher on the constitution because I don’t recall the part that says states can unilaterally wage a military campaign against children or anyone else for that matter.

Most of the unaccompanied children who have crossed the border are less than 10-years-old.

Posted in Immigration, Wingnuts | Tagged , , | 11 Comments

Super Stupid

picard_riker_double_facepalm

Steve “If Babies Had Guns” Stockman is apparently the comment troll of Congress, flooding the internal email system with wackobird messages about vast United Nations conspiracies, among other things.

“The principal individual involved was releasing DC letters every hour, on the hour, for a period of time running into weeks (apparently), in the belief that this was the norm,” Nate Pendley, Stockman’s chief of staff, told BuzzFeed Thursday. “I am grateful it has been called to my attention before we began to appear even more gauche.” [...]

“Steve Stockman is like the uncle that forwards you paranoid chain emails everyday, except this is Congress,” said [a former Republican] staffer. “Your first inclination is to reply with a link to Snopes, but you know it will only make things worse for you.”

Stockman’s office flooded his colleagues with gems such as “Protect the Second Amendment From U.N. Assault” and “Citizens ordered to turn in their guns? In America?”

I laughed at this for at least a solid 20 minutes.

Posted in Steve Stockman, Stupid Party, Super Stupid | Tagged | 5 Comments