Keepin’ it Classy in New Hampshire

Former Senator Scott Brown visited a tailgate party at the University of New Hampshire over the weekend and surrounded himself with fratbros. What happened next probably won’t surprise you.

Before breaking into a “Scott Brown” chant, a couple guys in the crowd had other things to say.

Almost immediately at the 8 second mark of the video, a couple guys yell “fuck her right in the pussy” in reference to Brown’s opponent Jeanne Shaheen. And if that left any doubt in your mind, they get more specific at around the 40 second mark.

Around 40 seconds in, a couple bros start yelling “Elizabeth Warren sucks” and “Jeanne Shaheen sucks” followed by “fuck Elizabeth Warren.”

That’s when the Scott Brown chant breaks out, but at the 1:10 minute mark one of the same bros yells “Jeanne Shaheen, what a cunt!”

Scott Brown does not have a history of surrounding himself with classy people and this is reminiscent of the time his campaign staffers made tomahawk chops and whooping sounds during his campaign against Elizabeth Warren.

Posted in Assholery | Tagged , , , | 12 Comments



New Hampshire state Rep. Steve Vaillancourt (R) skips the pleasantries and gets right to the heart of the matter: ugly women need not apply.

This gets progressively worse.

I seem to recall hearing that a new survey is out revealing that, with two caveats, an attractive candidate can have as much as a seven to ten point advantage over a less attractive (or even an unattractive) candidate.

Okay. I can see where this is going.

In New Hampshire’s second congressional district, if I may be so bold as to speak the truth, Republican Marilinda Garcia is one of the mot attractive women on the political scene anywhere, not so attractive as to be intimindating, but truly attractive.

So she’s attractive but not so attractive as to make you feel inferior? How nice for you.

Let’s be honest. Does anyone not believe that Congressman Annie Kuster is as ugly as sin? And I hope I haven’t offended sin.

“Ugly as sin.”

How ugly is Annie Kuster? Again avert your eyes if you don’t want to hear it, but I actually thought of Annie Kuster last weekend when I was in Montreal. Not far from the Second Cup Coffee Shop I at which I was sipping and writing is a bar called Mados. It’s on the section of St. Catherine Street which is blocked off for pedestrians only in the summer; it’s near the Jacques Cartier Bridge. Thus, tens of thousands of Montrealers and visitors walk by Mados on their way to the fireworks displays on summer nights.

On almost any given night, standing for all to see in front of Mados is a rather attractive drag queen. People stop to pose for pictures with this Mado drag queen; other drag queens gather round because, you see, Mados is a drag queen bar…not that there’s anything wrong with that. [...]

By now you probably know why I think of Annie Kuster whenever I walk by Mados; sad to say, but the drag queens are more atrractive than Annie Kuster….not that there’s anything wrong with that. [...]

Annie Kuster looks more like a drag queen than most men in drag.


Now that last bit came off very Freudian to me, but you get the gist. Women who are this ugly, he says, don’t have much of a chance to win.

Your accomplishments and policy positions apparently don’t matter if you don’t fit Republican Steve Vailliancourt’s definition of attractiveness. And on the flip-side, they also don’t matter even if you do meet his criteria of attractiveness. Vailliancourt says nothing of Garcia’s policies, only that she’s hot.

The good news for Steve Vailliancourt is that the same standard is not applied to men.

Posted in Epic Fail | Tagged , , | 5 Comments

Don’t Get “Cantored”


While this is an amusing anecdote, I believe it has implications for the next election.

Staffers have now coined the term “Cantored”, meaning to lose in what is otherwise considered to be a safe, Republican-controlled seat.

“Anyone who is in leadership or chairs a committee knows now that getting Cantored is a real possibility,” said one senior staffer of a House Republican committee chairman who is up for reelection.

Although Eric Cantor, as the former majority leader, did as much or more as anyone to obstruct the president’s agenda, he was successfully challenged and defeated from his right. Because Cantor wasn’t conservative enough for his constituents even though he personally prevented Speaker of the House John Boehner from cutting deals to avoid gridlock on multiple occasions.

While they’re primarily focused on the current election, If Republican campaign staffers are seriously concerned about getting “Cantored,” I infer that they will also be worried losing primaries to conservative challengers.

During the next election cycle, Republican incumbents may not wait for a challenger to emerge before they track hard right and the next session of Congress will likely be even more uncooperative than the current session because of Cantor’s loss.

Anyone who floats the idea that a “divided house” can encourage cooperation clearly hasn’t been paying attention.

Posted in Congress, Election 2014, Election 2016, Wingnuts | Tagged , | 3 Comments

The Unforgivable Hysteria of the News Media’s Ebola Coverage

There’s an arguably more serious pandemic in the United States and it’s reached new depths of awfulness and depravity. It’s not a virus, but it might as well be. To quote Jon Stewart, it’s hurting America and, specifically, inciting unnecessary panic.

This is, of course, the news media’s handling of the Ebola story, in which every human with a spiffy anchorman haircut, from Fox News to MSNBC to CNN to the network morning shows, is frantically delivering the most shamefully unforgivable abortion of journalistic integrity in recent memory. It’s not unlike the familiar behavior of local news anchors just before a light dusting of snow, screaming, “Snowpocalypse! We’re all doomed! Bread, milk, toilet paper! Go! NOW!” — but amplified by a factor of “you will personally eject blood from your anus and eye sockets! RUUUUUN!”

A few years ago, insufferable media bore Mark Halperin told us that the far-right old-school-HTML tabloid jockey Matt Drudge of The Drudge Report, “rules our world.” Not hearing anything recently to contradict such a claim, we can safely assume that Drudge continues to maintain some clout with the Old Media cocktail circuit, and if so, perhaps Drudge’s website could be (ahem) patient zero in this wildly exaggerated level of panic-mongering in the news media. Here’s just a sampling of the apocalyptic top story headlines from Drudge late last week… CONTINUE READING

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Morning Awesome

Asia – “Heat of the Moment”

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Highly Contagious

Highly Contagious

Artist – Clay Bennett

In other news, Republicans are already vowing to block all legislation if the president unilaterally closes the prison at Guantanamo Bay.

Meanwhile, Allen West (R-Batshit) tells us ISIS has taken a page out of the Media Matters playbook, whateverthefuck that is suppose to mean.

Posted in Open Thread | Tagged , , , | 6 Comments

GOP Candidate: ISIS Terrorists and/or “Illegals” (Same Thing?) Are Coming to Get Us

So here’s a campaign ad from the Republican candidate for lieutenant governor of Texas implying that ISIS is planning to cross “our border” in armed convoys, with credits to Fox News.

Hopefully we can stop them before they reach the Jerry Dome in Arlington.

Read or watch carefully as Patrick segues directly from armed convoys of terrorists crossing the Mexican border to “illegal immigrants.”

While ISIS terrorists threaten to cross our border and kill Americans, my opponent falsely attacks me to hide her failed record on illegal immigration.

Here’s the truth: Leticia Van De Putte opposed putting National Guard troops on the border, would send millions to Central American governments instead, and wrote the law giving in-state tuition to illegal immigrants.

National security begins with border security and that begins with the Texas Rangers and National Guard. Washington has failed us. As lieutenant governor, border security will be my top priority.

You know who else opposed putting National Guard troops on the border? All sane people.

Local Sheriffs along the southern border opposed their deployment because the National Guard doesn’t have the authority to make arrests or even question people they suspect are undocumented. Governor Rick Perry deployed them for a photo op and they haven’t been adequately funded. Some of the National Guard troops have even been forced to use local food banks because they have no money or resources.

As for the law “giving in-state tuition to illegal immigrants,” Republican Governor Rick Perry signed that into law.

Dan Patrick never directly says undocumented immigrants may be ISIS terrorists, but the imagery and implication is unmistakable.

I can’t overstate how much the climate of fear on the right is beginning look and sound a lot like the climate of 2004.

Posted in Immigration, Terrorism | Tagged , , , | 5 Comments

Outreach: Democrats Win Because Single Women Are “Wed” to Welfare

Picard and Riker Facepalm

Republican Senate candidate Jeff Bell has “done a lot of thinking” about it and he has concluded that he’s losing to Cory Booker by double digits because of single women on welfare.

I’ve done a lot of thinking about this and looked at a lot of different polls, I think it has more to do with the rise in single women,” Bell told the Asbury Park Press. “Single mothers particularly are automatically Democratic because of the benefits. They need benefits to survive, and so that kind of weds them to the Democratic Party.

But single women who have never married and don’t have children are also that way,” he continued. “If you take married women, they aren’t that different from married men. So it’s really a problem with the decline in marriage rates. The Democrats do benefit from that.”

Women, amirite?

Whether they have children — or not — single women just can’t quit welfare.

There’s nothing funny about this but I can’t stop laughing. I felt as though I could see the gears slowly turning in his head as I read this. He did “a lot of thinking” about it, after all.

While not many candidates would say something like this openly and as bluntly as Jeff Bell did, it’s perfectly in line with the Republican party which recently embarked on a nationwide ad campaign urging women to “Say Yes to the Candidate.”

Jeff Bell apparently believes women should marry for financial reasons and so does the rest of the Republican party. They want women to say “yes” to Governor Rick Scott and say “yes” to Governor Tom Corbett because they’ve got their shit together (allegedly), unlike you women folk who apparently need guidance so you won’t end up wed to welfare instead.

Relax, ladies, the conservative white men got this.

Posted in Stupid Party, Super Stupid | Tagged , , | 3 Comments

Report: President Obama Considering Executive Action on Gitmo


The Wall Street Journal reports the White House is examining ways the president could close the prison at Guantanamo Bay, including bypassing Congress.

White House officials have concluded Mr. Obama likely has two options for closing Guantanamo, should Congress extend the restrictions, which it could do after the midterm elections.

He could veto the annual bill setting military policy, known as the National Defense Authorization Act, in which the ban on transferring detainees to the U.S. is written. While the veto wouldn’t directly affect military funding, such a high-stakes confrontation with Congress carries significant political risks.

A second option would be for Mr. Obama to sign the bill while declaring restrictions on the transfer of Guantanamo prisoners an infringement of his powers as commander in chief, as he has done previously.

A veto of the National Defense Authorization Act (NDAA) seems highly unlikely to me given that we are now engaged against ISIS, leaving the latter option as more plausible.

The Journal says this could “provoke a sharp reaction” in Congress and I’d call that an understatement.

Both parties, Republicans and Democrats, have repeatedly voted to prohibit the president from closing the prison at Guantanamo Bay. During the early years of the Obama administration when Democrats controlled both chambers of Congress, the president faced unanimous opposition to transferring detainees to maximum security prisons inside the states. In more recent years, Democratic opposition to closing the prison has faded while Republican opposition has become the primary obstacle to closure.

Language that prohibits the president from closing the prison has been included in the NDAA, which funds the full scope of our national defense apparatus, making it difficult for the president to veto.

It’s possible a Republican-controlled House and Senate could place even tighter restrictions on closing the prison. It also seems increasingly plausible given the GOP’s renewed penchant for fearmongering and neo-con foreign policy.

In related news — I can’t explain why the Wall Street Journal refers to the president as “Mr. Obama.” Is “President Obama” or “the president” too wordy?

Posted in President Obama, Security | Tagged , , | 14 Comments

Scott Brown Really Wants to Secure the Border Because ISIS, or Ebola, or Something

The last time Scott Brown spoke about national security, he accused his opponent Senator Jeanne Shaheen and President Obama of attacking ISIS in the wrong location.

According to Brown, they made a mistake by attacking ISIS in Iraq rather than securing our southern border with Mexico.

Radical Islamic terrorists are threatening to cause the collapse of our country. President Obama and Senator Shaheen seem confused about the nature of the threat.

Not me. I want to secure the border, keep out the people who would do us harm, and restore America’s leadership in the world.

Scott Brown now says we should secure the border not because of ISIS; we should secure it because of Ebola.

BROWN: “As far as the potential for an outbreak in the United States, we have the best health care facilities in the world and I know our health care professionals are extremely capable of handling these cases. But once again, this underscores the need to secure our borders. We have already seen people with Ebola arrive in the United States through normal channels and the type of havoc that can create. My concern is with our unprotected border where people with Ebola and other infectious diseases can enter the country without being challenged. Senator Shaheen has voted repeatedly against securing the border. I believe that puts us at risk as a nation.”

When Brown says we’ve already seen “people” arrive in the United States with Ebola, I assume he meant to say “person” because only one person has slipped through the cracks. The doctors who were infected with Ebola were brought here intentionally under close supervision for treatment. Only one civilian has been diagnosed with Ebola and unfortunately he died yesterday.

It’s also possible, and it appears increasingly likely, that Brown was referring to the idea that immigrants may be disease carriers.

If you’re a regular reader here, you’re probably aware that conservatives, including several sitting congressmen, have been pushing the idea that immigrants may be carrying Ebola since mid-Summer. More recently some have even gone as far as to say that President Obama intentionally allow immigrants into the country to infect the rest of us with Ebola. There is no limit to their batshittery.

Given that Brown’s call to confront ISIS on our southern border is based on a conspiracy theory, I see no reason not to assume his call to stop Ebola on the border is also based on conspiracy theories.

In either case, there is an inescapable racial overtone because while Brown is running for office in New Hampshire, a state that borders Canada, he is focusing all of his attention on our southern border with Mexico approximately two thousand miles away.

Would Brown campaign on the idea that Canadians infected with Ebola pose an imminent threat to national security?

Scott Brown has become a race-baiter in his desperation. Or maybe he always was. His campaign staffers did make whooping sounds and tomahawk chops during his campaign against Elizabeth Warren. His supporters also made racist caricatures of her and called her “Princess Little Big Liar.”

Posted in Conspiracy Theory, Immigration, Racism, Security | Tagged , , | 4 Comments

Download This Week’s After Party Podcast! $2 per Download!


NEW! Download this week’s show via our new Band Camp page. No subscription necessary. Only $2 per download! Major credit and debit cards accepted.

If you’re already a member, go on in.

This Week’s Pulse-Pounding Episode: “Too Early for Anal”: Hammered Drunk; We Read the Sarah Palin Police Report; Rush Limbaugh Says the Unemployment Numbers are Fake; Chez’s “Anal” Facebook Post; Gone Girl (SPOILERS); The Death of a Podcast; Naomi Wolf is Nuts; The Next Ghostbusters Movie; The New ‘Better Call Saul’ Song; and much more.

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The Bubble Genius Bob & Chez Show 10/02/14


RELM_buttonHot For Teacher: Bill O’Reilly is Really Angry; Sarah Palin is Gonna Sue Bob; Victimhood and teachers Having Sex with Students; Secret Service Asleep on the Job; Bill O’Reilly’s Ridiculous Mercenary Force; How to do a Bill O’Reilly Impression; and much more. Brought to you by Bubble Genius, the Amazon Link and The Bowen Law Group.

There’s more political banter in the Bob & Chez Show After Party. If you’re not a member, download individual After Party podcasts for $2 each via our Band Camp page.

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Artist – Pat Bagley

In other news, faced with the reality of legal same-sex marriage, a Republican lawmaker in Utah has proposed legislation to rename same-sex marriages to “pairages.” Whatever it takes to keep othering gay people.

Meanwhile, Mike Huckabee says he’s done being a Republican if the party doesn’t get serious about stopping same-sex marriage.

We’re quickly approaching the point where there is nothing the party can do other than campaign for a constitutional amendment. Enter Ted Cruz.

Posted in Open Thread | Tagged , , , | 2 Comments


The Daily Show’s Kristen Schaal updates us on the GOP’s campaign to reach out to women, and there’s a bowl of birth control.

I had forgotten just how horrifying the conservative dating profile ad was. Holy shit it’s so bad. I can’t watch.

Posted in Comedy | Tagged , , , | 1 Comment

Tax Cut Magic


As you may already be aware, Kansas Governor Sam Brownback’s economic regimen has backfired. Tax cuts signed into law by his administration have left deep holes in the state budget which resulted in cuts to education, among other things. It’s been called everything from a “disaster” to a “catastrophe” while the Washington Post editorial board said it has put Kansas on a “path to penury.”

A path to poverty? Where have I heard that before?

Brownback, for his part, says his tax cuts will grow into a giant stalk leading into the sky if we simply give it time.

“I think the left is just so desperate,” Brownback said. “They want this model to fail so bad that they can’t wait for it to and they just want to get me electorally before we get on through this and prove that this is working.

The left wants the model to fail? The model has already failed.

Several years later, the state economy is in worse shape and Brownback is asking for more time for his evidence-shunning economic formula to kick in. The left, he says, is trying to ‘get him’ before his magic beans mature.

Americans waited a long time for the Bush tax cuts to work their magic and they never did. They only led to budget holes and budget cuts.

Conservative economic theory doesn’t work. It’s junk science. And you don’t have to take anyone’s word for it; you can just look at Kansas if the economic legacy of George W. Bush wasn’t enough evidence for you.

Republicans will undoubtedly run on the same failed economic policies in 2016, again, because that’s what conservatism is at this point. Conservatism is a series of conspiracy theories, bigotry, and self-serving denial.

Posted in Economy, Taxes | Tagged , , | 7 Comments

Dumb Dynasty


Zach Dasher, the nephew of “Duck Dynasty” star and infamous bigot Phil Robertson, is running for Congress and he’s pledging to stand up for your Second Amendment rights because you never know when we might have to overthrow the government.

“You take away a person’s right to defend themselves, then guess what, you can do whatever you want to them.”

“It’s important to recognize that the Second Amendment is not just the right to bear arms so we can go duck hunting or deer hunting or shoot skeet. This is a right to defend yourself, and not just against criminals but against a tyrannical government as well,” he added.

It’s confusing to me why someone who believes in the fantasy of armed rebellion is running for office, but I suppose it’s no more confusing that running for office on a platform that says government is the problem. But I digress.

The idea of overthrowing the government with arms hasn’t been a plausible reality since at least the 1860s and it never will be again. And it’s not clear what Dasher and others like him are referring to when claim they government can do ‘whatever it wants to’ if they aren’t able to defend themselves. What exactly do they believe the government will do?

It’s also not clear what the threshold is. At what point does armed rebellion become necessary?

When same-sex marriage arrives in Louisiana, will that be the last straw? When a Democratic woman is elected president, will that be the final insult? I ask because those are the only scenarios I can imagine happening in the near future that Republicans such as Dasher would view negatively. What else do they envision?

Talk of armed rebellion is masturbatory confederate fan-fiction and Civil War reenactment is the closest any of those who speak of it will ever come to the real thing.

Posted in Wingnuts | Tagged , , , , | 11 Comments

Jobless Claims Lowest Since Nearly 2005

via Bloomberg

Jobless claims declined by 1,000 to 287,000 in the week ended Oct. 4, a Labor Department report showed today in Washington. The median forecast of 50 economists surveyed by Bloomberg called for 295,000. The four-week average, considered a less volatile measure, decreased to 287,750, the least since February 2006. [...]

Firings are hovering around the lowest in almost a decade as employers hang onto workers to meet rising demand.

There’s that magic word: demand.

This is not the work of supply side tomfoolery or tax cut magic. This is good ol’ demand.

It’s true that a significant number of people have exited the work force entirely, but it’s also true that these numbers are good even when taking that into account.

Posted in Economy, Jobs | 3 Comments

Outreach: GOP Nominee Would Defend Interracial Marriage Ban


The Republican nominee for attorney general in Wisconsin, Brad Schimel, who is also the Waukesha County District Attorney, has been aghast that his Democratic opponent Susan Happ said she would not have defended the state’s ban on gay marriage.

Schimel says he would have gone a step further than defending the state’s ban on gay marriage. During an interview with Eye On Oshkosh, Schimel said he would have defended the state’s ban on interracial marriage if he was in charge at the time.

As he discussed his stance on that issue last month on an Oshkosh cable access program, he was asked if it would have been his obligation to defend a ban on interracial marriage if he had been an attorney general in a state with such a law 60 years ago.

He sighed and said, “Yeah, it is.”

“It might be distasteful to me …but I’ve got to stay consistent with that — as the state’s lawyer, it’s not my job to pick and choose.”

It might be distasteful … BUT I totally would have opposed the right of people to marry someone with a different skin color.

It’s not the obligation of the attorney general to defend laws that are unconstitutional or that violate civil rights. If an attorney general is unwilling or unable to act independently, the position itself is compromised.

Fortunately Schimel’s opponent has made this point.

“I am sworn to enforce the law, but also to uphold the constitution,” Happ said in her statement. “There is a place for independent judgment by the attorney general. Apparently, Brad Schimel disagrees.

Whether or not you would defend a ban on interracial marriage is a pretty easy, no-brainer question. Unless you’re a Republican. Then it becomes complicated.

Posted in Racism | Tagged , , , | 15 Comments

iPad Hacker Released From Jail, Parties with Glenn Greenwald, Publishes Neo-Nazi Screeds

Way back in 2010, a so-called “white hat” hacker named Andrew Auernheimer, known online as “Weev,” exploited a security loophole on Apple’s iPad and acquired the names of 114,000 AT&T customers who subscribed to the iPad 3G data service. Following an investigation, Weev, who had “stole” (his words) the user data was prosecuted and convicted. To his credit, Weev informed AT&T of the security flaw and the company quickly buttoned it up. But back in April of this year, Weev’s conviction was overturned because he was evidently tried in the wrong state (New Jersey), and he was subsequently released from Pennsylvania’s Allenwood Federal Correctional Complex on April 11, 2014. The indictment remains, but the conviction no longer stands.

During his time in jail, Weev apparently became a neo-Nazi, complete with a tattoo not unlike Edward Norton’s tattoo in American History X — a giant swastika on his right pectoral. After his release, he posted a series of racist and anti-Semitic remarks on a website called The Daily Stormer, a white-supremacist site not to be confused with The Daily Caller, The Daily Beast or The Daily Banter. Via Gawker, here are some choice passages:

I’ve been a long-time critic of Judaism, black culture, immigration to Western nations, and the media’s constant stream of anti-white propaganda. Judge Wigenton was as black as they come. The prosecutor, Zach Intrater, was a Brooklyn Jew from an old money New York family.[...]

The whole time a yarmulke-covered audience of Jewry stared at me from the pews of the courtroom. My prosecutor invited his whole synagogue to spectate.[...]

They took control of our systems of finance and law. They hyperinflated our currency. They corrupted our daughters and demanded they subject themselves to sex work to feed their families. These are a people that have made themselves a problem in every nation they occupy, including ours. What’s saddest is that we are the enablers of this problem. The Jews abused our compassion to build an empire of wickedness the likes the world has never seen.

No gray area there. Weev clearly hates…. CONTINUE READING

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Morning Awesome

Van Halen – “Dreams” Live

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